


Are You Able To Love?

by Benfrosh



Category: Final Fantasy VI
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, what if locke never apologized to celes and the two drifted apart after imtrf, what if terra and celes were ADORABLE together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-22 22:01:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8302829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Benfrosh/pseuds/Benfrosh
Summary: Terra and Celes grow closer after Locke refuses to apologize for his actions at the Imperial Magitek Research Facility.





	1. Chapter 1

Locke tossed and turned in his bed in the Albrook inn. Sleep wasn't coming easy that night, not after running into Celes again for the first time since... well, since he accused her of being a traitor. No point trying to gloss over it. He felt terrible now, of course - he felt terrible immediately after the words came out of his mouth. Tossing his trust away just because of something Kefka had said... he mentally kicked himself. 

He considered going outside for a breath of fresh air. Maybe he could find Celes. Talk to her. Try to apologize.

... _Nah._ He turned over in bed. What were the odds he'd even find her, anyways? Besides, it was cold and late. He set himself to sleep once more.

\---

Terra found herself startled awake. She shot up from her bed and looked around, afraid of something coming to get her. But she found nothing, save the shadows of the inn and Locke's snoring self. She let out a sigh. Ever since coming back to the Empire, she had been on edge - worried that someone would grab her, arrest her, force her back into the Imperial army. It hadn't happened yet, but... it worried her. 

Ever since the last of her memories had come back to her, a lot of things had been worrying her, actually. She didn't want to think about it, but with the adrenaline coursing through her veins she could hardly get back to sleep. She rubbed her eyes in exhaustion. It wasn't just her youth she remembered anymore... she remembered being kidnapped by the Empire, being trained by the Empire, having the slave crown put on her, being...

She shivered. There were still bits she didn't want to remember. Terra pulled her knees up to her chest and buried her face in them.

Thinking back on it all... had she ever done anything on her own? Made any real connections with anyone? She felt like she was just an object of pursuit sometimes, a damsel to be saved, a tool to be used. In a dark moment, she found a terrible thought creeping into her head. _Does anyone actually like me, or are they all only interested in me for my power?_ She knew Edgar and Locke claimed otherwise, but... did others see her as a real person? Could she be a real person, with the burden of these powers? Banon wanted her to release the espers, the Emperor wanted her for... something. Was there anyone she could trust? Who could understand her?

Well. Celes knew her, and seemed to care for her, and of everyone here, seemed like the person who could understand her the most. She blushed, remembering how direct she had been to Celes way back in Narshe. "Are you able to love?" What a question to ask someone! But she really did want to know. She felt like she couldn't - that her powers made her... inhuman. But Celes had those same powers, and if Celes could...

Celes and Leo. Of all the Imperials she ran in to, those were the only two that respected her. Even when she wore the slave crown, they looked out for her. It wasn't much - help with food there, an intervention to save her from rowdy guards there. But they had been nice to her. Celes, in particular, had kept risking it all for her. Even though Celes hadn't been there when she woke up again after her... incident... Locke had told her all about how Celes had sacrificed herself so that everyone could get away. To save her. Terra had no idea what she had done to deserve that, even. All those times Celes had reached out to her... she still hadn't done anything to pay her back. 

She looked out the window. The moon was still hanging high in the night sky. She decided that sleep probably wasn't going to happen that night. It was the first time in days she had gotten to really process her feelings, at least. She slid out of bed and snuck outside, careful not to wake Locke. _Maybe the fresh air will do me good._

Outside, after gently closing the front door of the inn behind her (the innkeeper was somehow still awake and promised to let her back in once she was done), she paused. She had wanted to get fresh air, but... she hardly knew where to go for that. The dock still seemed busy with soldiers running to and fro, packing the ship for the next day's trip. She started meandering over to the rest of the town when she saw her.

Celes was standing right on a small bridge, overlooking one of the town's waterways. She looked pensive - lost in thought over private issues. Her long blonde hair was cascading over her face and hanging out over the waterway as she leaned on the handrail. The moonlight had caught her just right, illuminating her in the shadowy night. She was radiant.

For a second, Terra hesitated. Celes looked... well, she looked like Terra shouldn't disturb her. Like a statue at an art gallery, beautifully posed in a sad figure. Terra had to remind herself that Celes was a real person, with real emotions, and was probably... probably sad, judging from her downfallen face. And maybe Terra could help with that. Selfishly, she relished the possibility, and began to walk over.

It wasn't until Terra joined Celes on the bridge that she finally noticed Terra's presence. She raised her head languidly. "Oh, hey Terra." She turned back to the water, her expression still downfallen.

"Hey, Celes." Suddenly feeling awkward, she reached up and twirled some of her hair around her finger. Whatever she wanted to do, she had no clue how to do it now. "N-nice weather we're having tonight."

Celes laughed hollowly. "Yeah, guess it is." 

Terra swallowed. "I wasn't planning on running into you out here, but..." She took a deep breath. "Thank you, Celes."

Celes turned to look at her. "For what? I've hardly done anything."

Terra shook her head. "That's not true at all. I've heard from Locke and the others what you did while I was... while I was transformed. How you helped everyone get to the Empire, and how you saved them all from Kefka."

Celes made no response, simply continuing to stare at Terra.

"A-and it's not just that. I remember back when we were in the army together, how you'd always look out for me and help me. We never really talked much then, especially after the...", Terra tried to avoid shivering as she said it, "slave crown. So I wanted to thank you for that."

Celes looked away and glanced down at the water. "... What prompted that now?"

"Hm?"

"Why now, Terra? We're not on the same side anymore. I'm back in the Imperial army, you're with the Returners..."

"I mean... we still are?" Terra replied with a giggle, confused. "You're one of us, Celes. Haven't you always been?"

Another hollow laugh. "Not according to Locke. He completely believed Kefka when he accused me of being a spy."

Terra blinked. "He did wha- no, nevermind," she interrupted herself, shaking her head. "It doesn't matter what Locke thinks. I trust you completely, and something that Kefka said could never change that."

Celes raised her head slightly. "Really?"

Terra nodded. "Really."

"What makes you so certain I'm so trustworthy?"

"I just... I see a lot of myself in you." Terra looked away from Celes, joining her in gazing at the reflection of the moon in the water. "I feel like I understand where you're coming from. Wanting to do something right for a change. To make up for all the pain we've caused in the past... I'm sorry if that's too presumptuous. But that's why I trust you."

Terra took a deep breath to compose herself. Putting herself out there like that had scared her, but- before she could finish the thought, she could feel Celes's hand on her own, resting on the railing.

"Thank you, Terra. I really needed to hear that." Even without looking, Terra could hear a bit of happiness in her voice that wasn't there before. Celes gave her hand a small squeeze. "I should probably be heading back to sleep. We have an early day tomorrow."

"Before you go..." Terra paused. "Do you remember, back in Narshe? I asked you if you knew how to love?"

Celes giggled. "Yeah, I remember that. Still not sure what you meant by it, though."

"It's just... when the slave crown came off, I had lost track of all my emotions. Even as they were coming back, bit by bit, with my memories, I still couldn't... remember love, at all. And I was afraid that something about me was broken and inhuman because of my powers."

Celes gave Terra's hand another supportive squeeze.

"So..." Terra continued. "I just wanted to know if it was possible to love when you're like this. Like us." Terra had turned to face Celes at this point, still holding her hand, and Celes had turned in kind. She looked deep into Celes's eyes, hoping to find an answer. 

Celes smiled warmly. "I think so. I haven't found it yet, but... I believe in it. And I believe in you, Terra."

Terra smiled back. Even a simple statement like that... it seemed to banish some of the shadows filling her heart. Especially from Celes. "Thank you. I really needed to hear that."

"No, Terra. Thank you for everything you've said to me." Celes finally let go. "But I really do have to sleep now. I'll see you in the morning, okay?"

Terra nodded. "Okay." She hesitantly took a step back, waving, before breaking off into a run back to the inn.


	2. Chapter 2

Terra woke with a start as one of the kids pulled on her sleeve. "Mama! Mama! It's time to get up," Gillian (she was pretty sure it was Gillian) shouted into her ear, before running off to play with the other kids, running around the living room. Terra slowly rose up from bed, the sheets falling off of her as she pulled her arms free to rub her eyes. 

Another dream about Celes. It had been a year since the disaster, and she couldn't get Celes out of her mind. It wasn't every night, thank goodness, but on days when she was startled awake she could still remember the dreams - her and Celes together, relaxing on the boat to Thamasa. Celes diving in front of her, shielding her from Imperial attack. The two of them, together with Shadow and Strago, taking out that horrible monster from the War of the Magi. Celes holding her sword over Terra as she sat there, helpless, before spinning around and stabbing Kefka in the stomach.

And the horrible, gut wrenching moment when Terra fell off the airship, watching Celes's terrified face as she fell to earth.

She missed all of them, of course, she thought as she cut a path through the kids to begin preparing breakfast. Locke, Edgar, Sabin, Cyan, Gau, Shadow, Strago, Relm, Setzer, even that weird little moogle, she missed all of them. But it was Celes most of all that hung in her thoughts. After finally forming a connection with her... feeling close to her... understanding her... to lose all that so quickly, just days after, stuck with Terra in a way nothing else had.

She didn't know why, but that loss seemed to extend to her powers, as well. From the place where she drew her fighting spirit from, it was just... a whirlwind of emotions now that she could barely comprehend, let alone process. Feelings she had never dealt with before, swirling around Now all she could achieve was mere living. She helped the children living here, but if anything really happened... she didn't know what she could do. 

She finally finished preparing the oatmeal and began pouring it into what bowls they had for the children. As she did, however, she heard footsteps on the staircase. "Duane, could you finish this for me?" she asked, handing the spoon she was using over to one of the larger kids as she went to see who the visitor could be. She hoped it wasn't a bandit or a monster-

She came face to face with Celes, paused halfway down the stairs. She could only imagine that the look on her face was one much like Celes's - complete shock. 

Celes was the first to recover. "Terra, you're alive?!" she shouted as she ran down the steps. "Oh, thank goodness!" She threw her arms around Terra in a giant hug.

Terra paused at first, before returning the hug to Celes. It seemed so hard to believe that it was really her, physically here, but the feeling of Celes holding her wasn't a lie. She was really alive. Terra fought back tears as the storm inside her heart gave way to calm seas at knowing Celes wasn't gone forever. 

Finally, they pulled apart. "Terra, I'm so happy you made it out from the crash alive." Celes took a deep breath. "I was so worried that you had... I thought the whole world had died. But you're here, and maybe everyone else is too."

Terra blinked. "Everyone else?"

Celes nodded. "I'm going to fight Kefka, Terra. I want to get the Returners back together, and I want to save this world once and for all."

"But..." Terra took a deep breath. "Celes, I can't fight anymore."

Celes's expression fell. "What happened? Did you get injured?"

"No, I just... I can't, anymore. I just can't find it within me." 

Celes pulled her in tight once more. "I'm so sorry, Terra. The fall must have been devastating for you."

Terra couldn't respond. She still didn't really know what was happening to her, anyway. 

"All the more reason to come with me. I'll protect you and we'll see what happens when we go out, see the world again? Maybe you can find it within yourself once more."

Terra shook her head. "I really can't, Celes. Plus, these children..." Terra couldn't bring herself to finish that sentence. Why was she arguing against going with Celes? Didn't she miss her? "Why don't you stay here, with us?" Terra argued helplessly. "We could work on the farm, maybe..."

"I can't, Terra. I know you understand. You told me that a year ago - that you wanted to make up for all the pain you've caused, and you could see that feeling in me too. I know you still feel the same way I do, deep down there." Celes reached out to touch Terra's heart, and Terra felt it speed up at Celes's touch. "Please come with me. We'll fight through this together."

Terra hid her face in shame. "I'm sorry, I just... I can't." Her soul screamed at her, but... "If that's the path you're going to take, I can't walk it with you. I don't have the power to, anymore."

Before Celes could respond, however, a loud roar came from outside. The kids instinctively scrambled to their hiding places as Celes spun in surprise. "What was that noise?!"

Terra knew it all too well. "Phunbaba. The demon released when Kefka destroyed the world." She gulped. "I have to go fight it off. To protect-"

Celes firmly pushed Terra back before she could move to the stairs. "You just told me you can't fight anymore. Let me do this."

"But these kids are my responsibility, you have bigger things to take care of-"

Celes smiled. "Let me protect you." And before Terra could respond, she ran off up the stairs. 

Terra could barely process all that had happened in the scant few minutes. Celes was alive, Celes had found her, but Celes wouldn't stay. She had bigger things to do, more important things, things Terra had lost the drive to do. And now she was risking her life for Terra anyways? Why did Celes even care? Without her power, what was Terra even worth anymore?

Without thinking, Terra followed Celes up the stairs outside. As she reached the front door of the hidden entrance to the basement she and the kids were hiding in, she carefully leaned out. Outside, Celes was locked in mortal combat with the ugly green demon. It seemed that Celes had the better of him handily - he wasn't casting any of the dark magic Terra knew he was capable of, suggesting Celes had sealed him off. That, plus her superiority in hand to hand combat, meant she'd have the edge. Terra let out a sigh of relief.

She hardly understood why, but watching Celes out there, fighting, moving with grace and skill, soothed the stormy feelings within her heart. It was hardly the place for it, but Celes looked like... a goddess stepped out of a painting. A awe-inspiring valkyrie descended upon the battlefield. 

_Beautiful,_ Terra thought unbidden. 

Suddenly, as if it noticed her, Phunbaba turned and looked straight at Terra. She froze in place at the realization she'd been found. She tried to move, but her legs refused to listen to her. She could only watch helplessly as Phunbaba charged at her, her life flashing before her eyes.

But before she died, Celes leapt in front of her once more, catching Phunbaba's body on the point of her sword. It roared in rage and ran off. Celes turned to check on Terra, asking her something that Terra didn't understand. Before she could figure out why, she fainted.

\---

Eventually, she woke up, slowly opening her heavy eyelids. She was in her bed once more, tucked in underneath the sheets. Celes was sitting by her side, holding a wet cloth to her forehead. "Celes? What happened?"

"You fainted when Phunbaba attacked you. Luckily I was there to save you." Celes rubbed her hand through Terra's hair. "Be careful, Terra. I couldn't take it if I found you again just to see you die."

Terra slowly blinked. "Why did you save me?" she asked.

Celes smiled. "Because I care about you, Terra."

"But I can't help you fight Kefka. I can't do anything. I'm just dead weight." 

"I didn't save you for your power, Terra," Celes replied chidingly. "I care about you for more than that."

Terra tried to comprehend what Celes was saying. Not for her power? But... what did she even have beyond that? "I... I don't understand. I'm sorry."

Celes patted her head. "It's okay. I'm still learning myself." She leaned in and kissed Terra on her head. "Take care of yourself, okay? I'll come back to check on you. I promise."

"... Okay. I'm going to get some more sleep right now."

Celes nodded. "I'll head out, then. See you soon, Terra." With that, Celes stood from the chair she was sitting in, and left the hideout. Terra watched her go, feeling her terrible heartache return as Celes walked out. She felt like if she could only understand why...


	3. Chapter 3

If Celes had haunted Terra's dreams before, she was a full-time occupant now. Every night since Celes had appeared out of nowhere to save Terra's life and vanish again, she had been all Terra could think about. She found herself getting lost in thought even in the middle of her daily chores, to the point where she had to let Duane and Katarin start taking over more of the responsibilities. She felt bad about taking up what free time they had, but at least Duane seemed to be maturing from the experience. That left Terra with the time to sort through her thoughts.

After days of thinking, there were two questions Terra still couldn't sort out. What did Celes mean when she said she was interested in her for things other than her power? And why did Celes leaving affect Terra so much? 

Both of them seemed tantalizingly close to explanations . Before the disaster, a year ago, the two of them had been growing close, bonding over their recovery from time in the Empire, the nature of their powers, the desire to do good... Terra thought they had a real friendship blossoming. To lose a close friend like that would upset anyone, wouldn't it? And clearly Celes just appreciated that friendship, right?

And yet... something in Terra's heart told her that that couldn't be the answer. That wouldn't explain why Celes risked her life to save Terra. That wouldn't explain Celes's parting words to her. And that wouldn't explain that she couldn't just be happy that Celes was alive, but instead be trapped always thinking of her, and thinking of...

Well. Terra sat up from the garden patch she had been deweeding to wipe her brow. She didn't want to admit it, but recently she had been starting to fantasize about Celes more and more. Imagining her beautiful face framed by her golden hair, seeing her move delicately in her mind's eye, watching her dance... she didn't have anyone to talk to about it, but she couldn't help but be embarrassed by it. It seemed... intrusive. 

She couldn't help it though, she thought as she swatted at a fly chasing at her. Something about Celes had struck her the other day in a way it hadn't ever before, and now... now. Now she wished she could talk to Celes again. If anyone could help her understand what she was going through, Celes could. Maybe she could-

Terra felt a hand clasp on her shoulder. She jumped with a yelp as she turned to see Celes herself, along with Setzer and Edgar. "Celes! You're back!" Instinctively she reached out to hug Celes, doubting herself at the last second before Celes reached out and hugged her back. Being in Celes's arms... seemed to calm her down, finally. Regretfully, she let go, eager to hug Celes once more to find solace again, but aware she should probably acknowledge the others. "Edgar, Setzer, I'm so glad you-"

But before she could finish, a loud roar filled the quiet town as Phunbaba broke once more from the waves and crashed onto the earth, out to wreak havoc once more. It let out a screech and pointed at the group, as if to threaten them.

"Terra, stand back. We've got this," Celes said authoritatively. Terra could do nothing but nod and fall back as the others moved to fight Phunbaba. She felt her heart beat faster at the thought of Celes going to fight again, and she wished nothing more than that she could join and protect her. 

At first, the fight seemed to be going well. Celes was able to hold off the beast before, and now that she had extra assistance the fight should have been a simple one. But Terra noticed that it moved faster than before, attacked more aggressively, and she grew concerned that the demon realized it was getting cornered. If it was out to get Celes and Terra once and for all...

Edgar leaped up into the air, spinning around and readying his lance for a final blow. Terra prayed this would be the end. As he fell, however, the creature looked up, took a deep breath, and unleashed a powerful gust of wind blowing Edgar away. He couldn't control his momentum and ended up plummeting into the water. Before Terra could even shout a warning, Setzer blindly charged at the beast as it was distracted, before catching a vicious backhand to be knocked away, his unconscious body flung into the ruins of a building.

Suddenly the battle had turned from a three on one to an equal encounter. And judging by the strength Phunbaba had just unleashed, this wasn't going to be equal at all. Terra's heart started thumping in her chest as she imagined the worst - Celes falling to Phunbaba, Phunbaba coming to get Terra next, then the children, then... but more than anything else, for some reason, the image of Celes's dead body stuck in Terra's mind. Torn to pieces, beaten to a pulp, crushed... she couldn't stop her brain racing through the terrible images, and she clutched at her head as if she could rip it out.

"No, no, no, no..." she whispered as a fire, long dormant, was stoked within her heart, growing larger and larger and threatening to consume Terra whole. "No, no, I won't, I won't..." The fire grew, and grew, until...

In a flash of light, she felt herself transform once anew. The turmoil within her became manifest as she was clothed in a pale flame that burned away her human shell and revealed her other self. Her Esper form. "I won't let you hurt Celes!" she shouted as she sprang into action, flying towards Phunbaba.

The beast seemed not to have noticed her, beginning to raise his claw to strike at Celes. Terra swiftly chanted an incantation to summon a great ball of flame which she flung at its back, lighting it on fire and causing it to scream in agony. Celes quickly took the opportunity to strike, running up with her sword and jumping onto the beast, jamming it into its neck and cutting off its scream. Its final surge put to a halt, the beast stumbled several steps before falling to the ground, its body burning away under Terra's flames. 

Terra set down from her flight, breathing heavily. Her heart slowly calmed down as she realized it was over. Phunbaba was finally dead, and everyone was safe. Celes was safe. She turned to look at Celes, who was staring at her. Terra looked down at herself ashamedly, realizing she was still in Esper form. "I'm sorry, I-"

But she was cut off when Celes ran over and pulled her into a tight hug once more. "Thank you, Terra. You saved my life!"

"R-really?" Terra hesitantly hugged Celes back, careful not to scratch her with her claws.

Celes nodded. "I would've been a goner. I don't know what happened, but I'm glad you're alright again."

Terra took a deep breath. "I think I know what happened, actually." 

Celes didn't respond, save to run her hand through Terra's long, pink hair.

"I finally found my reason to fight again. I had lost that with the world ending, but... I have one again. Here, in my arms. I want to protect you, Celes. I want to make a world where we can be happy together. I think that's the answer I've been looking for these last few days. Being with you makes me happy and content in a way I can't be without you. You make me feel... human."

Celes paused for a moment, then laughed. "That's not fair."

"Why not?" Terra replied confusedly.

"That was my reason to fight. I just want to make it safe for you once again. I want the both of us to feel comfortable with ourselves once more, so we can be happy together."

Terra sniffed back a tear. "Celes... I think I love you. ... Is that okay?"

Celes squeezed Terra. "It's okay, Terra. Because I love you too."


End file.
